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Hulk_bannerSupervising the trial of an experimental gamma bomb that he designed for the U.S. Defense Department at a nuclear research facility in New Mexico, Bruce selflessly rushed to the rescue of a stoned teenager resembling Charlie Sheen, who had wandered onto the testing field. After shoving the kid to safety in a nearby ditch, Bruce was struck full-force by the bomb blast. He survived, but was irradiated by the deadly gamma energy.

At first, Banner would transform into the brutish gray Hulk only at sunset, and revert to human form at dawn. This would immediately become problematic for Banner, for every time he transformed into the Hulk, his clothing would be destroyed, quickly depleting his closet and his bank account. Eventually, his changes into the childlike green Hulk came to be triggered by the release of adrenaline when intensely excited, and the color change a result of the consumption of irradiated spinach. The green Hulk possesses little of Banner’s memory and intelligence, and is easily enraged; making him a menace to society.

Since Banner’s initial transformation into the Hulk, military forces commanded by General Thaddeus “Thunderbolt” Ross – Bruce’s one-time benefactor – have hunted him continually. The Hulk continued to make more enemies within the military as he was constantly seen as Banner leaving the bedroom of Ross’ daughter Betty, at all times of the day.

For a short time, Banner successfully treated his condition with radiation and was able to maintain enough of his own personality when he became the Hulk to control himself in that form. Subsequently, he earned the government’s favor by destroying the alien named the Metal Master and received a presidential pardon.

Not long after, the Hulk was tricked by the Asgardian God Loki into destroying the Chicago L train. Loki had made the Hulk believe it was a giant snake trying to eat the city, after feeding him some “Special Brownies”. Iron Man, Thor, Wasp, and Ant Man track down the Hulk to capture him for maliciously ripping the city apart, but they soon discover the Hulk was under the spell of a god-strength dose LSD, and administer an antidote of methadone. With the Hulk lucid, the other heroes were able to determine it was Loki who was the true villain and the five heroes formed the Avengers to oppose him. The Hulk after being sworn in was so excited leapt into the air and wasn’t seen for five months. Apparently, when Banner awoke, he was somewhere near Budapest, and with out a wallet or passport found it somewhat of a challenge to get back to the States.

Eventually, the Hulk was captured by psychiatrist Doc Samson who successfully separated Banner from the Hulk. Samson after losing three teeth immediately realized what a huge mistake this was, for without Banner’s psyche to restrain him, the Hulk became a greater danger than ever before. Realizing women were only attracted to him while he was potentially dangerous, Banner agreed to merge back with the Hulk. But the stress of the re-integration fractured Banner’s subconscious, creating the street-smart gray Hulk. During this time, he spent several years in Las Vegas, sometimes operating as an enforcer calling himself Mr. Fixit (or “Joe Fixit.”) The smart-mouth Fixit was an ill-tempered, wise-cracking, thuggish brute whose personality resembled that of his father. Banner again found himself changing into the Hulk at night and into his human form in the light of the day.

Soon after, the swirling mess of persona and mentalities took their toll on the ever-flustered mind of Dr. Banner, and a quarter of a million dollar loss at the craps tables, a battle for control took place in Banner’s subconscious. Through hypnosis, Banner, the green Hulk, and the grey Fixit all aligned to face their true inner demons. With this realization, Banner was able to fuse these mentalities together, finding peace of mind. However, a green but somewhat “Forest Gump” like version of the Hulk emerged. He had the mentality of Dr. Banner,  the body of the Hulk, but the speaking ability of  Yoda.

Seizing the opportunity to be rid of the Hulk’s annoying speech impediment and his terrible Gamma-irradiated flatulence, a group of superheroes known as the Illuminati decided to jettison him into space, to a planet filled with puppies and bunnies. Unfortunately, there was a navigation error, and the Hulk crash-landed on Sakaar, a brutal slave planet where he was forced to fight in gladiator battles. The Hulk’s intellect and speech were repaired in the crash, however, he could not talk any reason to the inhabitants who all were significantly dumber than the he was on Earth.  Left with no other options, The Hulk was forced to fight, but he eventually brought peace to the planet. Hulk was proclaimed the Green King, and all those on Sakaar worshiped him and his Queen, Caiera. She told her king that she would bear him a child, and it seemed that the Hulk’s life of running and fighting was over. However, the Hulk was not destined for a happy ending as the Illuminati, who had heard of the Hulk’s future fatherhood and as a form of an apology, sent a rocket filled with Care Bears, booze, and cigars to Sakaar. Tragically the rocket’s landing gear malfunctioned and it exploded on impact, seemingly killing both his wife and unborn child, sending Banner into a rage like no other. He journeyed to Earth seeking revenge on the planet’s heroes for their part in Sakaar’s destruction.

Once back on Earth, the Hulk beat the living hell out of Black Bolt and took the city of New York as his battleground. Iron Man, Mister Fantastic and Doctor Strange all fell before the Hulk. Even the X-Men couldn’t even slow the Hulk’s rampage. In a brilliant and desperate last-ditch effort, Iron Man called upon the combined power of various satellites filled with Gamma-infused Grey Goose Vodka, that all blasted the Hulk simultaneously. The result left the Hulk in the semi-stupid half slurred speaking manner he seemed to be when he first became the Hulk, and his recollection of the entire Sakaar incident wiped from his memory.

Today the Hulk enjoys membership with the Avengers so they can keep a close eye on him. When not in Hulk form, Banner spends his time working at Avengers Tower as their CPA.


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  • Name: Dr. Bruce Banner
  • Birthday: May 8th
  • Education: Emory
  • Major: Physicist
  • Favorite Color: Green
  • Favorite Book: Performance Under Pressure: Managing Your Stress
  • Favorite Movie: Freak-out, The Wizard of Oz, Rain Man, Forrest Gump, The Waterboy
  • Favorite Food: Green eggs and ham
  • Favorite Quote: “That Make HULK Angry….You Make HULK ANGRY!!!!”

*Hulk is played by Casey Edwards, Bruce Banner is played by Dave R. Watkins

2 Comments

  • Al August 12, 2011 at 6:38 pm

    I’ve always liked the idea of Hulk being in the Avengers. Hopefully he’ll end up as such in the books after the movie next year.

    “Yeah yeah yeah, big green and angry…body gets so big your clothes break apart and falls off…pants are almost entirely intact…no wonder you’re so angry”

    Reply
  • Louie Lencioni February 7, 2012 at 7:04 pm

    Hahahahahahaha, this politics related YouTube video is in fact so comic, I loved it. Thanks in support of sharing this.

    Reply

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